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New book idea a la Captain Caffeine

Captain's Log, Stardate 04.14.2009

So my husband, Captain Caffeine, had lunch with a few friends a few days ago. And they asked about my writing, and if I’d been on Oprah yet.

(Yeah, right)

They then discussed NYT bestselling books, and why can’t Camy write a NYT bestseller.

(Sure, let me just open a vein over a blank page and it’ll come right out.)

So Captain Caffeine came home with ideas for my new NYT bestselling novel.

First it starts with vampires, because Twilight is so hot.

But not just any vampires. This one’s an Amish vampire.

And he’s not just an Amish vampire, he’s a cop in disguise, infiltrating the Amish community to protect a witness.

(Hmm, that storyline sounds familiar ...)

But wait! There’s more!

To add more conflict and stick with my brand of Asian fiction, we introduce the Tibetan monk! Who joins the Amish community to get away from the pressures of monkhood.

But in reality, he’s protecting the Chinese princess on the run, trying to escape from her father’s Hong Kong triad, pursued by assassins.

And since the triad assassins have guns, the Tibetan monk teaches the Amish community kung fu to protect themselves.

Bullets versus kung fu! Who will prevail????

Possible titles were discussed, and since this is turning out to be an action novel, all the title ideas had the Steven Seagal trademark of two or three one-syllable (or two-syllable) words:

Deadly Hoe
Nowhere to Plough
Amish Justice
Black Soil

What do you think?
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Comments

  1. Scraproni: Adventures of Single WomanTue Apr 14, 03:51:00 AM 2009

    wow sounds like quite an interesting story will it be starring Jackie Chan, Keanu Reeves, Jessica Simpson and Orlando Bloom and coming to a cinema near you! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. WinnieTue Apr 14, 07:17:00 AM 2009

    ROTFLMHO!!! Wait, I need to catch my breath!

    Oh, woo hoo, that's funny. That sounds almost like my husband. He came up with this great idea for me a few years back that I nixed quickly, something about Martin Luther.

    But my favorite all-time story, a quote by him when he realized just how good of a writer I am. "Honey, you need to do this for a living."

    ME: "Do what?"

    DH: "Make stupid people sound smart on paper."

    ReplyDelete
  3. Grateful GrammaTue Apr 14, 09:41:00 AM 2009

    I think you just gotta work a dog in there someplace and you're a shoe-in!

    ReplyDelete
  4. RosslynTue Apr 14, 09:59:00 AM 2009

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ronie KendigTue Apr 14, 10:26:00 AM 2009

    You stole my story, Camy!

    ReplyDelete
  6. UnknownTue Apr 14, 10:45:00 AM 2009

    Now why isn't Capt'n Caffine writing fiction? Or at least screenplays?

    I sense an unfulfilled calling here.

    On a side note, my e-mail is still defunct, so to answer your question: the eagle has landed.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Helga Marie BeeTue Apr 14, 11:56:00 AM 2009

    LOL, that is hilarious.

    I vote for a cameo of characters from your Sushi books...

    ReplyDelete
  8. RachelTue Apr 14, 12:57:00 PM 2009

    I like Amish Justice, especially if you try to say it seven times really fast.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Captain CaffeineTue Apr 14, 01:15:00 PM 2009

    I'm telling you....this storyline WILL work

    ReplyDelete
  10. The Green Yak on EtsyTue Apr 14, 04:15:00 PM 2009

    Hehe, nice!

    I think the second title there has a nice ring to it...

    ReplyDelete
  11. Camy TangTue Apr 14, 04:53:00 PM 2009

    Hey! The Captain stopped by! How cool!

    You guys are cracking me up! It's amazing what ideas flow out of too much caffeine and not enough sleep.

    Camy

    ReplyDelete
  12. DeliaTue Apr 14, 04:58:00 PM 2009

    Hahahaha!!! Best thing I've heard/read all day!!

    My vote is for "Nowhere To Plough"!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Dineen A. MillerTue Apr 14, 04:58:00 PM 2009

    ROTFL!!! I love Deadly Hoe. It'll take a double meaning if you put a prostitute in there somewhere. LOL! This is just too funny. You're hubby gets high marks for humor.

    ReplyDelete
  14. LauraTue Apr 14, 05:22:00 PM 2009

    Where's the cowboy? He could ride in on his white stallion and rescue the princess!

    ReplyDelete
  15. CatherineTue Apr 14, 10:42:00 PM 2009

    Wow, sounds awesome!!!!

    I like Deadly Hoe as the title.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Jeanette LevellieWed Apr 15, 10:02:00 AM 2009

    Camy:
    I think El Capitan needs to write his own book. He'll soon see what a piece of cake it is!
    Jeanette

    ReplyDelete
  17. Helen BratkoWed Apr 15, 11:16:00 AM 2009

    Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh. You should write a Vampire book - but Amish, with Ninjas? Sounds like something my teens would come up with! lol

    ReplyDelete
  18. Marcus GoodyearWed Apr 15, 03:05:00 PM 2009

    Wait a minute. This is a joke? Darn it. See, I'm the kind of guy who actually buys Pride and Prejudice and Zombies (I'm half way done). So Deadly Hoe sounds like it could be a real book to me.

    ReplyDelete
  19. UnknownWed Apr 15, 05:51:00 PM 2009

    Camy, I'd love to read Cheryl's book. Please enter me in the drawing. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  20. UnknownWed Apr 15, 07:02:00 PM 2009

    That is too funny!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Danica FavoriteSat Apr 18, 09:07:00 AM 2009

    Wow!! I had no idea the Captain was so brilliant (at things other than making the perfect cup of coffee, of course!). Ya know, I know an agent who is looking for something just like this! It would totally sell!

    ReplyDelete
  22. triciaSun Apr 19, 05:39:00 PM 2009

    Hilarious! So glad I caught this post.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Carrie Fancett PagelsMon May 11, 11:09:00 AM 2009

    Captain Caffeine has got to be an engineer. Sounds like ideas I would get from my husband (marine mechanical engineer) and daughter (electrical engineering student)!

    ReplyDelete
  24. GloriaMon May 11, 01:25:00 PM 2009

    I love it! lol i vote for "Nowhere to Plough"! i can't wait until it comes out! Go Camy!

    ReplyDelete
  25. AnonymousThu Jun 11, 09:31:00 PM 2009

    Crouching Quilter, Hidden Fang.

    Shelley
    http://www.shelleyadina.com

    ReplyDelete

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