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What I'm writing in YEAR OF THE DOG

I just finished writing Year of the Dog ! It had a massive plot hole that I had to fix which turned out to be more work than I expected. Here’s a snippet: “Hey, Auntie Nell.” He wrapped his arms around her, bussing her on the cheek and breathing in pikake flowers and shortbread cookies. And suddenly he was nine years old again, and her solid presence had made his chaotic world stable once more. “What are you doing here?” He usually took her to dinner on Wednesday nights, but today was Tuesday. The edges of her smile faltered a little before brightening right back up again. “What, I can’t visit my nephew?” She angled around him to enter his home. “Is this your new house? Looks lovely.” Which was a blatant lie, because the fixer-upper was barely livable, much less acceptable to a neat-freak like his aunt. She also left four matching pink and purple floral suitcases on the stoop behind her. Only then did Ashwin notice the cab driver standing slightly to the side of the walkway. “Can ...
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Sleezy Dippin Dunkin

Captain's Log, Stardate 03.30.2009

I got this from Pam Hillman. She is Sleezy Farkletush.

My NEW NAME IS IN THE SUBJECT LINE. DON'T LAUGH UNTIL YOU FIND OUT WHAT YOUR NEW NAME IS

The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...

So:-

1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:

a = snickle
b = doombah
c = goober
d = cheesey
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = dumbo
h = farcus
i = dorky
j = doofus
k = funky
l = boobie
m = sleezy
n = sloopy
o = fluffy
p = stinky
q = slimy
r = d orfus
s = snooty
t = tootsie
u = dipsy
v = sneezy
w = liver
x = skippy
y = dinky
z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

a = dippin
b = feather
c = batty
d = burger
e = chicken
f = barffy
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = farkle
j = monkey
k = flippin
l = fricken
m = bubble
n = rhino
o = potty
p = hamster
q = buckle
r = gizzard
s = lickin
t = snickle
u = chuckle
v = pickle
w = hubble
x = dingle
y = gorilla
z = girdle

3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:
a = butt
b = boob
c = face
d = nose
e = hump
f = breath
g = pants
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = head
l = tush
m = chunks
n = dunkin
o = brains
p = biscui ts
q = toes
r = doodle
s = fanny
t = sniffer
u = s prinkles
v = frack
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = hiney
z = juice

Thus, for example, George W.. Bush's new name is: Fluffy Chucklefanny.

What are you???
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Comments

Daniel Fattore said…
Looks like you got some flood...

Well, I tried the little game you proposed - and am happy to introduce you Mr. Sloopy Dippinsniffer. Quite surrealistic...!
Mon Mar 30, 06:12:00 AM 2009
PatriciaW said…
Wow! Haven't read that book in six or seven year. Love the Captain Underpants series.

Say hello to Tootsie PottyBrains.
Mon Mar 30, 06:52:00 AM 2009
Barb said…
Dorfus Dippintush
Mon Mar 30, 07:06:00 AM 2009
windycindy said…
I am now Sloopy Pottybiscuits!
Such an elegant new name.
Thanks, Cindi
Mon Mar 30, 10:01:00 AM 2009
Anonymous said…
LOL. What a hoot! I'm Crusty pottyhump.
ROTFL
Mon Mar 30, 10:35:00 AM 2009
Rose said…
How fun!

I'm Snooty Chickennose.
Mon Mar 30, 10:50:00 AM 2009
Anonymous said…
hello... hapi blogging... have a nice day! just visiting here....
Mon Mar 30, 12:30:00 PM 2009
Jaime Wright said…
Dorky Chuckledunkin

Niiiiiiice!!!! :) lol
Mon Mar 30, 05:53:00 PM 2009
Alexander Field said…
Very funny game you've got here....I am happy to introduce myself: Snickle Farklehump. Nice to meet you! : )
Mon Mar 30, 11:48:00 PM 2009
Anna Weaver Hurtt said…
Sloopy Chickenbutt here. LOL Such a nice name. I remember doing this with my family once... what a hoot!
Tue Mar 31, 07:26:00 AM 2009
Jill said…
Boobie Pottydoodle signing in!
Mon Apr 06, 06:45:00 AM 2009
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