Captain's Log, Stardate 01.08.2008
I'm in an emotional quandary.
I offered to do something for a friend. She said, "Great!" and gave me the info I'd need.
No "thanks," "thank you," etc.
Am I just too old-fashioned, that I expect a "thank you" if someone offers to do something for you?
It also occurred to me that maybe this friend feels so comfortable with me, she assumes she doesn't need to say thanks, that I already know she's thankful.
But something in me just wars against that kind of thinking. I don't care how comfortable you are with me, or how long we've been friends--I want a polite "thank you" if I'm doing you a favor.
What do you guys think? How do you teach your kids about stuff like this?
I'm in an emotional quandary.
I offered to do something for a friend. She said, "Great!" and gave me the info I'd need.
No "thanks," "thank you," etc.
Am I just too old-fashioned, that I expect a "thank you" if someone offers to do something for you?
It also occurred to me that maybe this friend feels so comfortable with me, she assumes she doesn't need to say thanks, that I already know she's thankful.
But something in me just wars against that kind of thinking. I don't care how comfortable you are with me, or how long we've been friends--I want a polite "thank you" if I'm doing you a favor.
What do you guys think? How do you teach your kids about stuff like this?
Comments
If i ask someone to do something for me i always say thanks. its something thats just manners.
even if you are very comfortable with others manners doesn't hurt and is often more so.
So, while I'm on the subject ... thanks for the great blog posts Camy! You always make my day :-)
Maybe she's figuring she'll thank you when the deed is done, but she should be appreciative of the offer as well.
I'm a mean mom. If someone gives something to my children and they don't say "thank you", I gently remind them. Still no "thank you", I firmly remind them. After that, if they still don't say it, I make them give their gift back. If they don't/can't appreciate it, then they don't need it. I haven't had to do that in a loooonnng time though.
And on that note, thank you for writing about this. Good post.
-TimK
But I also know, for myself who hustles and bustles from early AM to late PM every day, that occasionally I forget what my mother taught me. My mind is moving off to the next thing before I finish the last.
Usually I'll remember that I neglected my manners or a niggling question will make me wonder, in which case I'll back track and ask, "Did I say thank you? If not, I meant too. Thank you much." or simply "Just wanted to thank you for ..."
So perhaps it was simply an unintentional ommission, unless that person exhibits a pattern of neglect. I'm a big believer in "benefit of the doubt" until evidence suggests otherwise.
Thanks for an interesting topic!
So here's part of it.
Camy, thank you for all the prayers, love and support over the years. You're a far better friend than I ever deserve, but I value you more than you'll ever know.
Hugs!!!!
Luk 6:31 Just as you want others to do for you, do the same for them.
Luk 6:32 If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.
Yeah, I'm still learning too.
So maybe this friend thinks he/she is your bff? :))
L.Stewart