キャミー・タング著「戌年」連載小説 プロのドッグトレーナーであるマリ・ムトウは、厄年を迎えている。 犬小屋と訓練所の改築をしながら、いつも不服そうにしている家族と同居することになった。母と姉に言わせれば、犬の毛とよだれかけにまみれる仕事は、家族にとって恥ずべきものだという。彼女は元カレを説得し、数ヶ月間犬を預かってもらうことにした。しかし、彼の兄は、数週間前に彼女が誤って車に追突した、怒り狂ったセキュリティ専門家であることが判明する。 アシュウィン・ケイトウは十分な問題を抱えている。叔母が玄関先に現れ、同居を希望している。彼は彼女にすべてを借りているので、断ることができません。母親が家を出て行った後、ネルおばさんはアシュウィンと弟を引き取り、愛のあるキリスト教の家庭で育てた。しかも、弟のダスティもアパートを追い出され、居場所を求めている。しかし、彼は犬を飼っている。そして、その犬の飼い主は誰だと思いますか? しかし、旧友でオアフ島のノースショアでデイスパを経営する私立探偵のエディサ・ゲレロから依頼を受ける。マリの施設で奇妙な破壊行為があり、3年前に失踪したエディサの妹の財布を発見する。エディサはマリが危険な目に遭っているのではと心配する。警備の専門家であるアシュウィンがすでにマリを知っていることを知ったエディサは、忙しい若い女性を密かに監視することを彼に依頼する。 アシュウィンは、活発でのんびりとしたドッグトレーナーに不本意ながら惹かれていく。彼女は、幸せそうな母親を思い出させる。その母親の裏切りによって、彼は人と距離を置くようになったのだ。マリは、アシュウィンの冷たい外見を見抜き、彼が家族に忠実な男であることを認める。彼は、彼女のキャリア選択を批判するだけの母親や姉とは違う。 マリのバラバラな家庭とアシュウィンのバラバラな家庭の中で、過去を隠そうとする人たちから、彼らの周りに危険が迫ってくるようになる。彼らは、影で動く秘密に光を当てることができるのか? 過去に発表されたパートへのリンクはこちら。 *** 第8章 - 恐ろしくも真っ白な不動産書類 『みんな仲良くできないのかな?』 マリは無用に力を込めて箱に本を投げ入れた。最近、なぜ彼女は人生の中で全員と言い争いをしているのだろう?もしかすると、これは本当に悪いアイデア
Captain's Log, Stardate 12.16.2005
A woman on the ACFW email loop posted about the road to publishing being long and discouraging. I applaud her for persevering for so long, and also for being in touch with God. She asked Him if she should continue or not, willing to give it up for Him, but He's telling her to continue.
What she said really resonated with me, because I actually gave up writing years ago when I felt God telling me my motives weren't right. That was a painful thing to do, but I knew He wanted me to do it--it was a VERY clear message from Him, nothing questionable about it.
God let me pick my writing up again (with an aim for publication, versus just writing for me) a few years ago. I'm still unpublished, but I know this is what God wants for me now. The whole thing about writing is the waiting game, and the struggle for me not to feel jealous when people who have been writing for less time than me get that elusive publishing contract.
The only thing I can do is to keep working hard to perfect my craft. I've read tons of writing books, gone to conferences and workshops. Above all, I keep writing. I don't think I could stop if I wanted to.
One thing that has helped me a lot is talking with newly contracted writers and listening to their struggles and fears. I'm very glad of the fact that I now have several completed manuscripts. I understand the struggle to push through the last half of the book, I know the feelings of insecurity before starting the next one. These life experiences happened without the pressure of a contract hanging over my head. I couldn't imagine how STRESSED I'd be if I had sold my first manuscript, and had to go through this emotional rollercoaster while under deadline! Yikes!
At RWA National conference, the biggest thing I heard is that a lot of writers just quit because it's too much work and too emotional (the waiting, the rejection, the scathing critiques, etc.). The ones who persevere are the ones who eventually perfect their craft enough and hit on that unique story idea or story angle that catches an editor's attention.
Janet Edgar passed away this year, but she was one writer who had been persevering for a long time. She finally sold to Steeple Hill last year, although she never lived to see her book published. Her story of struggle and unshakeable optimism is always inspiring to me, because through years of no nibbles, she kept on writing and cheering her friends who published.
I admit, I don't know if I could do that. I take it one day at a time. Wondering "when?" is too stressful for me, and it's hard to fight the jealousy, I'll be honest. And then ironically whenever I have some success, I feel bad because I know other writers who have been working and persevering like me who didn't receive success. Now isn't that stupid of me? Sheesh. It's like I don't know my own mind.
So I guess my point is, take it one day at a time. It's hard for me not to grit my teeth when people talk about "God's timing" even though I know I need to trust Him more. I try to be honest with myself and with God, and He helps me release the fear, impatience, and self-sufficiency I keep holding on to.
A woman on the ACFW email loop posted about the road to publishing being long and discouraging. I applaud her for persevering for so long, and also for being in touch with God. She asked Him if she should continue or not, willing to give it up for Him, but He's telling her to continue.
What she said really resonated with me, because I actually gave up writing years ago when I felt God telling me my motives weren't right. That was a painful thing to do, but I knew He wanted me to do it--it was a VERY clear message from Him, nothing questionable about it.
God let me pick my writing up again (with an aim for publication, versus just writing for me) a few years ago. I'm still unpublished, but I know this is what God wants for me now. The whole thing about writing is the waiting game, and the struggle for me not to feel jealous when people who have been writing for less time than me get that elusive publishing contract.
The only thing I can do is to keep working hard to perfect my craft. I've read tons of writing books, gone to conferences and workshops. Above all, I keep writing. I don't think I could stop if I wanted to.
One thing that has helped me a lot is talking with newly contracted writers and listening to their struggles and fears. I'm very glad of the fact that I now have several completed manuscripts. I understand the struggle to push through the last half of the book, I know the feelings of insecurity before starting the next one. These life experiences happened without the pressure of a contract hanging over my head. I couldn't imagine how STRESSED I'd be if I had sold my first manuscript, and had to go through this emotional rollercoaster while under deadline! Yikes!
At RWA National conference, the biggest thing I heard is that a lot of writers just quit because it's too much work and too emotional (the waiting, the rejection, the scathing critiques, etc.). The ones who persevere are the ones who eventually perfect their craft enough and hit on that unique story idea or story angle that catches an editor's attention.
Janet Edgar passed away this year, but she was one writer who had been persevering for a long time. She finally sold to Steeple Hill last year, although she never lived to see her book published. Her story of struggle and unshakeable optimism is always inspiring to me, because through years of no nibbles, she kept on writing and cheering her friends who published.
I admit, I don't know if I could do that. I take it one day at a time. Wondering "when?" is too stressful for me, and it's hard to fight the jealousy, I'll be honest. And then ironically whenever I have some success, I feel bad because I know other writers who have been working and persevering like me who didn't receive success. Now isn't that stupid of me? Sheesh. It's like I don't know my own mind.
So I guess my point is, take it one day at a time. It's hard for me not to grit my teeth when people talk about "God's timing" even though I know I need to trust Him more. I try to be honest with myself and with God, and He helps me release the fear, impatience, and self-sufficiency I keep holding on to.
Comments
I get more discouraged at my own weaknesses, though. And I figure writing and publication is tough FOR EVERYONE, believing and non-believing. It's like anything else that's time-consuming and requires skill, and it's also competitive, and most of all, its a solitary enterprise that then becomes a public object for praise or scorn.
For hermits like me, the public part is scary, even as I pursue it throught he private endeavors.
Nice to have folks like you, Camy, on to be a smiling angel of encouragement and humility.
Mir