Integrity rejection

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.21.05

I got the nicest rejection possible from Integrity Publishers. Basically saying my heroine needs more backbone, what Maass refers to as “larger than life” characteristics. Like Scarlett O’Hara, can’t get larger than life than that.

After reading Maass, I’ve been realizing how my first manuscript really could use some fireworks to kick it up a notch, so Integrity’s comments aren’t that surprising to me. I’m bummed, but I’m also doing okay, honestly.

The good news is that my agent didn’t dump me as the last rejection came in. He encouraged me to try something new, taking the editors’ comments into account, and assured me he’s interested in trying again. I emailed to ask him if I should continue with the Asian romantic suspense, or try another Asian chicklit. I wouldn’t mind delving into humor again, maybe with a bit of mystery woven in.

But ultimately, I guess it’s what God wants me to write. I was mentioning to Sharon today that I felt rather unsure about this romantic suspense, whether I could write it or not. I suppose it has to come from God, not from me, but it’s hard to feel confidence that God really truly wants me to write this. I mean, what if I’m wrong about His will for me, and I end up typing 300 pages of drivel? But I guess He would have a purpose in those 300 pages of drivel. He doesn’t do anything without a reason.

So now what? I work on my romantic suspense. No, strike that--I pray, and then I work on the romantic suspense. I’ve been praying, but more is better. Sooner or later, God will speak to me. He always does. He doesn’t stay silent forever. I need to put my heart in a place where I’ll hear Him when He does.

Writing: Still plugging away with those 100 words a day. Got more ideas and plotting done on my romantic suspense. I just need to allow myself a truly crappy first draft. I read that somewhere. It didn’t strike me at the time, but now I can see what the author was talking about. Now that I know the “rules,” I need to allow myself to break them left and right, if only to get words on paper.

Diet: Doing okay. 1700 calories yesterday despite the piece of Marie Callender’s sour cream apple pie. I’ve been doing well at eating vegetables with every meal. My coworker (I think she’s part Vietnamese) eats marinated grilled pork (like you get in Vietnamese pho restaurants) atop a bed of lettuce. The meat flavors the salad, a bit like the warm spinach salad at Frankie, Johnnie and Luigi Too! Restaurant--they sauté bacon, walnuts, gorgonzola cheese and ziti pasta together, then toss it with fresh spinach. The hot sauté wilts the spinach a bit and flavors everything.

So anyway, I made a sausage frittata the other night. I heated it, cut it into pieces and threw it on top of some spring greens salad. It was really good, better than I expected.

Today for lunch I had yummy finger-food--prosciutto (about 3 oz.) and steamed asparagus. Total today = 1700 calories. Hopefully I can keep my hands off the Trader Joe’s truffles until bedtime.