Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.18.05 Well, I got a chance to do some walking today during my lunch break, and the knee is a bit more swollen than normal so I have to remember to ice it. It was nice to get some exercise, though. I felt healthy, anyways. I’ve gained so much weight since the surgery, it’s embarrassing. I think my attitude about work is getting better. It still fluctuates between calm and panic, but on a whole I’m more accepting of this stage in my life, that God is using it to mold me. Am I becoming more patient? I hope so. It’s nice to be busy at work, although it’s very hard to get up in the mornings. I need to marshal my energy so I have more for my writing in the evening. Writing: Got my 100 words done, but not much else. I did brainstorm a bit for my ms. I’ll have to do more today. Diet: 1400 calories yesterday, minus the exercise at PT! Today so far it’s 900 calories, but I also walked during lunch, 100-150 calories. I hope I can keep that u...

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.17.05 You know, I read other writers’ blogs and they’re just so darn spiritual. I usually have a lot of fluff and random thoughts. Does that say something about me? I am a typical post-modern Christian, I think. Rather shallow, fast-paced, ultra-stimulated. Maybe it will help me write what will relate to post-modern Christians. I think it helps me relate to the teen girls at my church youth group. Kristin Billerbeck has agreed to be interviewed for the God’s Girls column in RubyZine . Becky asked me to do it since I know her, sort of. It’s so hard to come up with questions. I think I’d make a terrible journalist. I just went through the 5 W’s and an H and came up with a bunch of generic stuff. I think I need to give more effort to my writing. I’ve been rather lax because I think I’m entitled to it after the stress of working all day. But I should give it my 100%, because it’s something important that God has called me to. I’ll try to wor...

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.16.05 I am enjoying a lazy Sunday with my dog in my office. Well, she’s sort of trapped in my office because I need to close the door to keep the heat from escaping. She doesn’t seem too upset, although if I went to the door she’d probably jump up with her butt wiggling. Today is the last day for the northern California Christian teen retreat, Winter Vision. My fellow youth group leader, David Kawaye, is the speaker for the Junior High school division. Terrific honor. I’m positive he’s done a great job this weekend. He’s already spoken at church a few times and he’s always done a great job when teaching the kids at youth group meetings on Saturday nights. There are also several cabin leaders who used to be part of our church youth group. I love how they volunteer to give up their weekend to serve this way. It makes me feel both proud and old to hear of my former youth group students being cabin leaders. I’ve been watching Battlest...

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.14.05 I’m feeling terrible today. I’ve had a cold all week but today I have a pounding headache in addition to my sore throat and cough. On a positive note, my friend Pammer had a cyst removed without problems. Yay, praise God! My Quiet Times have been good. I think I am even starting to gain a little patience. Work is fine, although I still would rather be writing, but I’m starting to see how God can use this time and this experience to mold me into a servant He can use. And if that’s His agenda, I’m all for it. Writing: I had a good time Wednesday night reading Maass and tweaking my storyline. I especially worked on how my setting can become a vital part of the storyline. I mean, it makes sense when you think about it--a setting should be like a crucial character in the story. The plot or the characters wouldn’t be the same if the story were set somewhere else. But yesterday I forgot to do my 100 words, and I spent the ev...

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.12.05 I started on a short story yesterday. I’ve had the idea for a while but never started it, for some reason. I was reviewing my goals for 2005 and remembered that I wanted to write one short story a month. I also wanted to try the Club 100 for Writers, and write 100 words a day. That’s difficult to do when I’m plotting a novel, but I realized I could start my short story and do 100 words a day that way. So far, I’ve gotten a pretty good scene set up (although I get the feeling it needs pizzazz) and I’ve written 422 words, 267 yesterday and 155 today. I never realized how easy it is to get 100 words written. Of course, I’ll probably end up cutting half of it, but it’s writing invested in this story idea. It’s 422 more words than I had before! Work is going well. My new supervisor is fair and my project is straightforward. I found out I’m quite underpaid for some reason. My coworkers are speculating it’s because the company that owns us...

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.11.05 Well, I finally finished Star Trek Voyager! I loved this series, it was fabulous. Granted, some episodes had phenomenal writing and acting while others sucked rocks, but on a whole it kept me riveted. The end was rather abrupt, I would have liked to see what the main characters’ receptions and reactions were like when they stepped foot on Earth again. Work has been rather good. Not very busy, nor very stressful. Well, except for today when my manager called me in just to see how I was doing, and also to let me know that my new project is High Profile and Very Important. Meaning, if I screw up, the company Directors will see and be upset. Greeeeeeeeat. No, that doesn’t increase my stress levels at all... But my new supervisor is good, and I have other Research Associates who work under him. We form a team, rather than before when it was just me under my old supervisor. It’s nice to be part of a team like that, I feel supported by my ...

Captain’s Log, Stardate 01.07.05 Today went well at work. I finished a coworker’s stuff so that she could leave early to be home with her son, who was sick. I also helped another coworker (the one who’s going to join my group at the end of the month) and spent a nice time talking with her. It felt good to do something versus sitting around trying to look busy. I am feeling better about work. Another coworker told me today that they all thought I wouldn’t return to work, after my bad experience under my supervisor. It felt kind of nice to be able to joke about it, and also to know that others could see what a rough time I was having, that it wasn’t my imagination. But I’m very glad it’s the weekend. I’ve been praying God will help me to enter this weekend and find the rest I need, not to worry about work next week. Last night’s devotional mentioned how God doesn’t show us a clear path ahead of us. Instead, He clears the path for us as we walk forward. I want to live...